Only - this is not quite how I imagined it would happen - there was no massive loss of poundage involved.
I arrived at work tonight with all in order - well as in order as one can be while living in an abyss, known as the overnight shift, but I digress.
Back to the pants...
After working for five minutes I stood up check on some video, only to realize my zipper was down. No worries, I will just nonchalantly zip them up and continue on my way. Then a moment of panic when the reality of the situation registered. Wait a minute - there is no zipper pull!
That's right, somewhere between the parking lot and newsroom my pant's zipper imploded.
And the worst part... the pant's closure is a snap - not a button. I am getting a blister on my thumb from re-snapping, because every time, and I do mean EVERY time, I exhale, the snap bursts open with the force of a torpedo. Seriously, it could take the eye out of a small child with that kind of force. And foolish me, I continue to re-snap each time hoping it will work "this time."
Instead, I am like a grandpa on Thanksgiving who just consumed an oversized meal of turkey and all the side dishes... pants undone, gut hanging out.
Now, if only I were plopped in front of a fireplace, dozing to the sounds of football...